About Us
Gabe Perna: I'm a 22 year old recent college graduate with a passion for sports, random sitcoms and creating wildly unrealistic situations with my friends for comedic effect. Currently I work at a digital magazine where I write case studies on fascinating subjects such as companies that make seeds (just kidding it's not that bad!). I also enjoy cool breezy New England Autumns, books by Bill Bryson, the occasional tune by Mr. Billy Joel and playing basketball despite the fact I usually play like a un-coordinated, handicapped dwarf. My favorite sports teams all play in Boston, however, my sports idol growing up was Barry Sanders. He made me want to write about sports when I realized I was too white and Jewish to play them for a living. If I could meet one person, it'd be the one and only, Sarah Palin and see if she'd be interested in going shooting, eating moose stew and trashing liberals. Oh wait that's Bill O'Reilly. I'd meet Larry David. Finally...I'm going to be a sitcom writer one day. Just you wait. GO PATS! Expect some heavy content from me on this website, shit that'll make you rethink your life. Okay not really, but I promise to entertain for you at my own expense.
Chris Ellard: COMING SOON!
Pat Sullivan: I'm a 22 year-old Associate Court Officer with the Massachusetts Trial Court. As with everyone writing for the site, I'm a huge Pats fan, and have been since I started watching football 15 years ago. I'm also a big Celtics fan, although the Pats will always be #1 in my heart. I love playing bball, often with the 2 guys above me. I love hiking, always with my girlfriend Maura. I'm in the process of training my beagle, Scout, to be a guard dog, but so far he's only learned to attack skunks (sprayed 4 times this summer). I'm pro-Pearl Jam (and grunge in general) and very anti-Billy Joel, although I listen to at least a few artists from pretty much every genre. I hope to one day meet Michael Moore... so I can push him down a flight of stairs. Jason Williams is my sports idol. Arnold Schwarzennegger is my American Idol. I'm 15/16 Irish, and damn proud of it. I'm probably the only person in history who went to 3 levels of college (private, state, community) and worked for 3 levels of the government (city, state, federal) before the age of 21. My favorite books are Calvin and Hobbes. I don't eat fruit or vegetables. My favorite beer has been called some pretty cruel things by friends, but I will always enjoy an ice-cold Amstel light. My favorite food is the Jack Daniels Pulled Pork Sandwich from TGI Fridays, and if you haven't tried it, you must. My favorite animal (other than Scout) is the mighty skunk... also Scout's least favorite animal. I'm the websites fantasy expert, and if you're very lucky I might chip in an editorial every now and then.
Rec Room All Stars
The latest hitch and go route from Plaxico
It has been far too long for far too many reasons for me to list since I've sounded off, but there are plenty of blog worthy topics in the world of sports so I thought it was time to chime in.
This morning in a Manhattan court room, former Steelers and Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress had his weapons case against him adjourned until September. Which means if the case goes to trial, it won't happen until early 2010 giving Burress exactly what he wanted, a chance to play the upcoming NFL season as soon as a team shows interest; the Jets and Bucs already have. But this isn't a knock against any team that shows interest in Burress, a 6'5 potential number one receiver should garner plenty of interest no matter what his situation, just ask the twenty teams that passed on Randy Moss in 1998. The fact is if this guy is available to play every GM should be after him. If Dennis Rodman was available in his prime, I'd sure as hell want him on my team. Even if he's pulling down rebounds in a wedding dress he's still pulling 'em down for my team instead of another. So while this morning's ruling is another small victory for Plax's legal team, it is another Giant defeat for the legal system.
Lets review the facts. Late last November Burress was in a NYC night club carrying a loaded, unlicensed handgun. His gun accidentally went off and shot Burress in the leg. We'll leave out the fact that Burress' teammate Antonio Pierce failed to report the accident to the police and fled the scene back to Jersey yet was never punished by the Giants or the law for his obstruction of justice. Burress was suspended four games by the NFL. There's a start. The Giants then took the "high road" with Burress soon after; releasing Burress from the team. I hope noone was impressed with the organization's moral integrity given the fact that Burress wouldn't have been able to play again from his injury until the very end of the season. So the Giants' "tough" decision to let him go given the size of his contract and bullet wound was a no-brainer even Sarah Palin could have figured out.
After the shooting took place, mayor Bloomberg spook out calling for at least the minimum 3 1/2 years in jail for the NFL star. Preach 'Big Mike'!
What's the hold-up? He had an unregistered handgun, loaded, in a crowded club, and was so stupid that he managed to shoot himself, which on its own should warrant some jail time. Give him a deal, forgot about the hundreds of other people that could have been hurt which should compound the sentence, and only give him the minimum as long as he speaks out against gun use. Case closed that takes 47 seconds to decide. Instead, no trial date will even be decided until almost a year after the incident took place.
Not that several NFL teams couldn't use Plaxico's talent, but it's a talent that shouldn't be available. The legal system has already failed proving their ridiculous idea that stars don't get preferential treatment, the NFL shouldn't follow suit. So here's hoping that big bad Roger Goodell, the enforcer, lives up to his reputation that he's built for himself the last several years. Suspend Burress immediately. You have the facts Roger, you know he broke the law, not to mention the personal conduct policy which you love to enforce, so pull the trigger (no pun intended).
This morning in a Manhattan court room, former Steelers and Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress had his weapons case against him adjourned until September. Which means if the case goes to trial, it won't happen until early 2010 giving Burress exactly what he wanted, a chance to play the upcoming NFL season as soon as a team shows interest; the Jets and Bucs already have. But this isn't a knock against any team that shows interest in Burress, a 6'5 potential number one receiver should garner plenty of interest no matter what his situation, just ask the twenty teams that passed on Randy Moss in 1998. The fact is if this guy is available to play every GM should be after him. If Dennis Rodman was available in his prime, I'd sure as hell want him on my team. Even if he's pulling down rebounds in a wedding dress he's still pulling 'em down for my team instead of another. So while this morning's ruling is another small victory for Plax's legal team, it is another Giant defeat for the legal system.
Lets review the facts. Late last November Burress was in a NYC night club carrying a loaded, unlicensed handgun. His gun accidentally went off and shot Burress in the leg. We'll leave out the fact that Burress' teammate Antonio Pierce failed to report the accident to the police and fled the scene back to Jersey yet was never punished by the Giants or the law for his obstruction of justice. Burress was suspended four games by the NFL. There's a start. The Giants then took the "high road" with Burress soon after; releasing Burress from the team. I hope noone was impressed with the organization's moral integrity given the fact that Burress wouldn't have been able to play again from his injury until the very end of the season. So the Giants' "tough" decision to let him go given the size of his contract and bullet wound was a no-brainer even Sarah Palin could have figured out.
After the shooting took place, mayor Bloomberg spook out calling for at least the minimum 3 1/2 years in jail for the NFL star. Preach 'Big Mike'!
What's the hold-up? He had an unregistered handgun, loaded, in a crowded club, and was so stupid that he managed to shoot himself, which on its own should warrant some jail time. Give him a deal, forgot about the hundreds of other people that could have been hurt which should compound the sentence, and only give him the minimum as long as he speaks out against gun use. Case closed that takes 47 seconds to decide. Instead, no trial date will even be decided until almost a year after the incident took place.
Not that several NFL teams couldn't use Plaxico's talent, but it's a talent that shouldn't be available. The legal system has already failed proving their ridiculous idea that stars don't get preferential treatment, the NFL shouldn't follow suit. So here's hoping that big bad Roger Goodell, the enforcer, lives up to his reputation that he's built for himself the last several years. Suspend Burress immediately. You have the facts Roger, you know he broke the law, not to mention the personal conduct policy which you love to enforce, so pull the trigger (no pun intended).
And It Stinks...
It's a well known fact the comments section of any article posted on the internet is where you find the most miserable turds on the planet. If I was popular enough - and lord knows that ain't happening soon - I'm sure I'd get littered with dozens of comments on how much I suck for writing this very article. When you see the comments section of an article, more often than not you get responses like: "Who the hell hired you to write? (Insert writer's opinion) is probably the stupidest thing I've ever heard. In fact, I could find a (insert responders lame insult attempt) to write better than you! I HATE YOU! I WANT YOU TO DIE!" You never see: "Good work, while I may disagree with your opinion, I thought you did a decent job of making a provoking argument."
It's generally a depressing experience to read a good article, followed by lines and lines of brain-dead responses from people without either a) pubic hair b) a degree of any kind and c) a working knowledge of the English language. In fact, I may be putting myself out there when I say this, but perhaps Stalin had it right. Perhaps some people are too fucking stupid to deserve a voice. There should be an IQ test for anyone wanting to write a comment on an article. I'm not really sure why it bothers me so much. I guess it's because it seems like every yokel out there thinks they can write. Listen pal, I don't come to your job, knock the toilet brush out of your hand and tell you how to wipe, do I? So I sympathize with the professional writer - or the one who at least runs a respectable blog - who writes a well thought out piece, only for it to get shat on by some tinker toy brain jealous prick, who's mad s/he works at the Quick Stop.
What brought about my anger was an article posted on Boston.com today titled, 'Local teams have a shot at unheard-of slam." Written by John Powers, the article focused on how within the calendar year - the Bruins, Celts, Sox and Pats, all have an opportunity to win their respective championships. No city has ever seen all four major sports teams win a championship in the same calendar year. The article basically pointed out how amazing this was and how lucky we as Boston sports fans are blessed to have this plethora of excellence in our lives.
I generally agree, I think it's astounding we have four teams who are legit contenders for their championships (although the Sox are scaring me a bit out of the gate). To me, we've been blessed as a sports fan base no matter what happens the rest of this decade. To go on a run like the one we are enjoying, it's amazing. If we could pull of this seemingly impossible quartet calendar year feat, It'd probably never get topped. Is it probable? No. I don't think anyone, the writer or even the most optimistic, naive sports fan is that blind. However, to even be able to consider this feat, shows how good Bostonians have it right now. Look at Philly, it took those miserable SOBs 25 years to finally win something and they're still not done complaining.
Anyway, you'd think there'd be an outpouring of gratitude from the fans. People might realize, "Hey many sports fans never get to see one of their teams go on a run like this, we as Bostonians could see all four of them do it in a single year. Pretty cool." You'd think that. Of course, you'd be wrong. Judging by some of the cynical assholes on the comments section of the article, not only should we not be grateful, nor hopeful, nor even ignore the article if we disagree, we should mock the writer for even suggesting such a silly idea. The response on that board - which for a liberal newspaper has a surprising number of conservative haters - was akin to telling a PETA member you just harpooned a whale. (I admit bostonsportsmedia.com posted something like this earlier today, here's his article) I agree with him, the Globe which is normally a beacon of negativity, actually had a nice, fun, little positive article.
Yet here are some of the responses:
"Are you insane? The Red Sox look horrific, the C's are only as good as KG's knee will let them be, the Pats...well who knows. The Bruins are the only team that have a shot right now, and even that is a long shot. Seriously...what are you people thinking?" - Missy813
"Great article Mr. Powers...you have now guaranteed that none of our teams will win the championship...thanks." ScooterFromQuincy
"What a stupid thing to be writing at this time. I guess the writers have nothing else to talk about so they parade out this dribble especially when we have the Sox off to a miserable start." PrettyRickey
Those are some of the better ones. And to this I ask one question: Are Bostonians really this angry/spoiled? Or is this a misleading sampling of the Boston sports fan base? To be fair, these could be outsiders trying to do their best to shit on the Boston fan base. However, I tend to think it's from within. Why would NY'ers for instance, go to Boston.com just to shit on Boston Sports Fans. Maybe, a few might do that, but I doubt there'd be an outpouring of hate from the East River. Furthermore, I'm an obsessive comments reader (perhaps the real reason I hate them is because like staring at a woman's plumber's crack it's often hard to turn away from comments) and I notice a lot of people with the same names commenting on several articles. Also, their naems like ScooterFromQuincy kind of give it away.
So are Boston fans really this negative? I'd like to think not. However, I've been around this town long enough to know there are countless cynics down by the River Charles. After all, our baseball team didn't win for 86 years, our city hall is about as corrupt as Daniel Day-Lewis in Gangs of New York and we're generally a blue collar working city with an alcoholism problem. It all adds up to cynicsm personified.For instance, go to a Boston bar when the Patriots fall behind, it's like hearing cat calls at a gong show or something. Brutal. It all goes back to the immortal Rick Pitino and what he said about this town:
"Larry Bird is not walking through that door, fans. Kevin McHale is not walking through that door, and Robert Parish is not walking through that door. And if you expect them to walk through that door, they're going to be gray and old. What we are is young, exciting, hard-working, and we're going to improve. People don't realize that, and as soon as they realize those three guys are not coming through that door, the better this town will be for all of us because there are young guys in that (locker) room playing their asses off. I wish we had $90 million under the salary cap. I wish we could buy the world. We can't; the only thing we can do is work hard, and all the negativity that's in this town sucks. I've been around when Jim Rice was booed. I've been around when Yastrezemski was booed. And it stinks. It makes the greatest town, greatest city in the world, lousy. The only thing that will turn this around is being upbeat and positive like we are in that locker room... and if you think I'm going to succumb to negativity, you're wrong. You've got the wrong guy leading this team."
I'd just like to see after six championships in seven years and the possibility of more on the way, a bit more positivity. Then again, with comments sections, you could find a negativity from a picture of a double rainbow. Maybe one day over the double rainbow, I'll stop going to comments sections. Maybe.
It's generally a depressing experience to read a good article, followed by lines and lines of brain-dead responses from people without either a) pubic hair b) a degree of any kind and c) a working knowledge of the English language. In fact, I may be putting myself out there when I say this, but perhaps Stalin had it right. Perhaps some people are too fucking stupid to deserve a voice. There should be an IQ test for anyone wanting to write a comment on an article. I'm not really sure why it bothers me so much. I guess it's because it seems like every yokel out there thinks they can write. Listen pal, I don't come to your job, knock the toilet brush out of your hand and tell you how to wipe, do I? So I sympathize with the professional writer - or the one who at least runs a respectable blog - who writes a well thought out piece, only for it to get shat on by some tinker toy brain jealous prick, who's mad s/he works at the Quick Stop.
What brought about my anger was an article posted on Boston.com today titled, 'Local teams have a shot at unheard-of slam." Written by John Powers, the article focused on how within the calendar year - the Bruins, Celts, Sox and Pats, all have an opportunity to win their respective championships. No city has ever seen all four major sports teams win a championship in the same calendar year. The article basically pointed out how amazing this was and how lucky we as Boston sports fans are blessed to have this plethora of excellence in our lives.
I generally agree, I think it's astounding we have four teams who are legit contenders for their championships (although the Sox are scaring me a bit out of the gate). To me, we've been blessed as a sports fan base no matter what happens the rest of this decade. To go on a run like the one we are enjoying, it's amazing. If we could pull of this seemingly impossible quartet calendar year feat, It'd probably never get topped. Is it probable? No. I don't think anyone, the writer or even the most optimistic, naive sports fan is that blind. However, to even be able to consider this feat, shows how good Bostonians have it right now. Look at Philly, it took those miserable SOBs 25 years to finally win something and they're still not done complaining.
Anyway, you'd think there'd be an outpouring of gratitude from the fans. People might realize, "Hey many sports fans never get to see one of their teams go on a run like this, we as Bostonians could see all four of them do it in a single year. Pretty cool." You'd think that. Of course, you'd be wrong. Judging by some of the cynical assholes on the comments section of the article, not only should we not be grateful, nor hopeful, nor even ignore the article if we disagree, we should mock the writer for even suggesting such a silly idea. The response on that board - which for a liberal newspaper has a surprising number of conservative haters - was akin to telling a PETA member you just harpooned a whale. (I admit bostonsportsmedia.com posted something like this earlier today, here's his article) I agree with him, the Globe which is normally a beacon of negativity, actually had a nice, fun, little positive article.
Yet here are some of the responses:
"Are you insane? The Red Sox look horrific, the C's are only as good as KG's knee will let them be, the Pats...well who knows. The Bruins are the only team that have a shot right now, and even that is a long shot. Seriously...what are you people thinking?" - Missy813
"Great article Mr. Powers...you have now guaranteed that none of our teams will win the championship...thanks." ScooterFromQuincy
"What a stupid thing to be writing at this time. I guess the writers have nothing else to talk about so they parade out this dribble especially when we have the Sox off to a miserable start." PrettyRickey
Those are some of the better ones. And to this I ask one question: Are Bostonians really this angry/spoiled? Or is this a misleading sampling of the Boston sports fan base? To be fair, these could be outsiders trying to do their best to shit on the Boston fan base. However, I tend to think it's from within. Why would NY'ers for instance, go to Boston.com just to shit on Boston Sports Fans. Maybe, a few might do that, but I doubt there'd be an outpouring of hate from the East River. Furthermore, I'm an obsessive comments reader (perhaps the real reason I hate them is because like staring at a woman's plumber's crack it's often hard to turn away from comments) and I notice a lot of people with the same names commenting on several articles. Also, their naems like ScooterFromQuincy kind of give it away.
So are Boston fans really this negative? I'd like to think not. However, I've been around this town long enough to know there are countless cynics down by the River Charles. After all, our baseball team didn't win for 86 years, our city hall is about as corrupt as Daniel Day-Lewis in Gangs of New York and we're generally a blue collar working city with an alcoholism problem. It all adds up to cynicsm personified.For instance, go to a Boston bar when the Patriots fall behind, it's like hearing cat calls at a gong show or something. Brutal. It all goes back to the immortal Rick Pitino and what he said about this town:
"Larry Bird is not walking through that door, fans. Kevin McHale is not walking through that door, and Robert Parish is not walking through that door. And if you expect them to walk through that door, they're going to be gray and old. What we are is young, exciting, hard-working, and we're going to improve. People don't realize that, and as soon as they realize those three guys are not coming through that door, the better this town will be for all of us because there are young guys in that (locker) room playing their asses off. I wish we had $90 million under the salary cap. I wish we could buy the world. We can't; the only thing we can do is work hard, and all the negativity that's in this town sucks. I've been around when Jim Rice was booed. I've been around when Yastrezemski was booed. And it stinks. It makes the greatest town, greatest city in the world, lousy. The only thing that will turn this around is being upbeat and positive like we are in that locker room... and if you think I'm going to succumb to negativity, you're wrong. You've got the wrong guy leading this team."
I'd just like to see after six championships in seven years and the possibility of more on the way, a bit more positivity. Then again, with comments sections, you could find a negativity from a picture of a double rainbow. Maybe one day over the double rainbow, I'll stop going to comments sections. Maybe.
I hate to do this....
I'm going to have to agree with Skip Bayless. (gulp). Wow I feel dirty for even saying that. I've gone in depth (probably on this site I just can't bother to look through the archives) on how much I really hate Skip Bayless. In fact, I remember during the NBA Finals last year when he called Paul Pierce a "faker" for his knee injury, I wrote a rant on Facebook. The premise of that rant actually led to the creation of Rec Room All Stars. So there ya go. I hate the guy. His most famous moment was accusing Troy Aikman of being gay in his 1996 book "Hell-Bent." He had no proof other than the fact Troy was not married during his time with the Cowboys. Right, because that really means a guy is gay. Man that Tom Brady (who up until recently was not married so don't give me that crap, I know all about the engagement), he must be gay, boning supermodels and hot actresses. What a fag.
Skip is that annoying, mind numbing type of journalist who loves to take the other side of an issue just to a) stand out b) piss people off. It's the Dan Shaughnessy - Curly Headed Boyfriend School of Journalism. "If people are writing you 500 letters of hate mail a day you're doing a damn good job." For instance, I might be having a debate with some friends on who is the best player in the NBA. I might say, LeBron and for argument's sake (because I know he wouldn't ever say this), Sull might say Kobe. Skip would probably barge over uninvited (because believe me, my friends and I would never hang out with a middle aged, nasally voiced deuchebag, so he'd have to come over uninvited), he'd come over and say, "YOU'RE BOTH WRONG. THE ANSWER IS CLEARLY ANTWAN JAMISON GUYS." This might be an extreme example, but in reality, it's how the guy operates. He takes an extreme position, yells at the person he's debating and sits back smugly afterwards like he's Rush Limbaugh after conquering a buffet.
I hate him. Yet sadly, today I'm in complete agreement with him. The topic is on "fantasy sports" and before we get started let's provide a link to the scintillating debate.
First off, before we get to why Skip is actually right, let me say I still think he's a deuche even when right. The way he moves about like a drunk Italian on crack pisses me off. Dude, you can make your argument without coming across like your Mussoulini or something. The moderator is a jackass too. "He'll never do it. He'll never do it." Dude what are you his little cheerleader? You like to see him act like a deuche to a nice guy like Matthew Berry? That's how it comes off to me. Then again, I'm on a roll, so I could just be ranting for the sake of ranting.
Anyway, I've tried to get into fantasy sports. I've tried it before. I've done fantasy baseball and football, (basketball is just weird if you ask me). I just can't get into it. And it's like Bayless says (shudder), I just don't care about stats and individual results. I care about teams winning and losing and positioning for the playoffs. It's hard to get excited for some worthless player on some worthless team in a worthless game, just because he's doing well. Bayless is right. I'm sorry, rooting for obscure players to get stats is not only stupid, it defeats the whole purpose of sports. Whatever happened to that team thing all of our little league coaches stressed? Or is it more important to see little Johnny score six goals because Coach has him on his fantasy league even if the team loses?
Furthermore, the thing that really bothers me about fantasy sports is the fact it makes you cheer for players not on your team. There's nothing that pisses me off more than hearing, "Well I want the (team I cheer for) to win but I'd like (player on my fantasy team) to have a good game too." No. NO. NO!!! What the hell is that shit? Are these the people who go to work and say, "Well I hope we get the big sale and our company dominates but I also would like to see Joe from our competition do well too, just not as good as us." Where's the American spirit of domination? What the deuce? Not to sound like Glenn Beck, but when did we lose this American ideal of taking our competition by throat and choking the ever loving you know what out of them?
Isn't the point of sports as Mr. Herm Edwards once said, "To Win The Game." I'm pretty sure Herm wasn't talking about the fantasy game. He was talking about the real one, the one played on the field. In fantasy, you play to win a fictional game based on stats from individual players making up a contrived team you created. In the real thing, you play to win the game, without any regard to stats or individual achievements. That's the core ideal of sports. And really, as a fan of a team, you should want to see them dominate and leave nothing behind. You shouldn't watch the game and say, "Well I hope they have a good game - but if their defense gives up 400 yards passing, I won't mind." Well I do mind. The fact you don't mind, well I mind that.
Believe me, I hate Skip Bayless so much I actually found myself feeling bad for Lil Wayne for having to deal with this toolbag.
Matthew Berry seems like a nice guy, but his arguments are weak. It may be fun. But like putting fat porn on your friend's comptuer,it being fun doesn't make it right. It may create a sense of bonding with friends. Here's my response to that: go camping. Weak, my friend, real weak. The intelligence thing irks me. There are two things in sports that people do and it makes them talk as if they were some kind of expert: Fantasy and Gambling. Let me make this clear: if you do either, it does not mean you are an expert in sports. THe experts are the people who actually coach and play. Not some dude who bets the over on the Duke-UNC game. Case closed. And for me, (and obviously Skip), fantasy sports does not give me a rooting interest in every game. Like I said, I just don't care about other teams and their individual players. And stats are pointless to me for the most part (unless it's like Kobe scoring 72 points or something record breaking). I'm more interested in the result, you know, like who wins or loses.
So I'm sorry but you'll never get me to do fantasy. I like Skip "deal in reality." And I too am "philosophically opposed to fantasy."
Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to wash up after writing that.
The Power of Twitter
I'm like you. And everybody else. When something gets popular I'm all about it. I was the one in school who was writing Pen 15 on your hand, making the "I can make you speak like an Indian" joke ten times after you heard it and playing with hackey sacks with other posers. A few months ago I posted the 25 things nonsense from Facebook. Oh right, Facebook, I hopped on that bandwagon early too. It's my nature to see why things become popular. So naturally I immerse myself in those things and then suddenly realize why they become popular.
Well, add another thing to the list: Twitter. Because of the age we live in, things like Twitter grow from an unknown website to everyone's method of communication in a few months. Guarantee if you went up to someone a few months ago and told you them you like to Twitter, your average person would have recommended you go see a nerves doctor. Now everyone knows what Twitter and is doing it themselves.
"Flipping off the Xmas Tree."
Of course, the biggest proponents of Twitter have been celebrities and athletes. The growth of Twitter has been in direct relation to their use of it. Because really, they are the only people who's every move we care about. You already know what your friends are doing for the most part. Oh is it a Wednesday during the day? Ellard must be at work. You know, like every other day. But what exactly is Rainn Wilson up to? Let's check the ol' Twitt machine to find out!
For famous people Twitter is a new wave of communicating with their fans. Gone are the days when celebs/athletes would receive letters in the mail from their fans, maybe write a few back and that would be that. Now with Twitter not only can you communicate with your fans with a click of the button and a few written words, you can do it in real time. Shaq just landed in an airport in Memphis. He's pumped to play the Grizzlies. We know this because he Twittered us a few hours before the game. He also says if you greet him like a rockstar at the airpot, he's got a few free tickets he'll give away. Ah - a little bribery in order to feel like John Lennon. Nothing wrong with that.
Paul Pierce just used Twitter for this very reason today. In fact, this was the story that got me fascinated by the whole ordeal. A 5:12 (I feel like a cop - I wonder if Twitting could ever be used in a trial. Your honor may the record show he Twitted at - alright stay on task Gabe) he Twitted, "Change in schedule first 5 fan wit my jersey on at players parkin entrance get tik to todays game." He followed that up with, "aight on my way to arena b there at 430 with my jersey players entrance free tiket to game only got 5 left hurry up passcode is truth." So naturally when he came to the arena, a number of fans mobbed his Range Rover ala the Beatles.
Meanwhile, Charlie Villanueva isn't using his Twitting to become like the Beatles (although he does give away tickets through contests ala Casey Kasem). He also gives real time updates to his fans. Like really real time updates. During a game vs. the Celtics a few weeks back he Twitted the following, "In da locker room, snuck to post my twitt. We're playing the Celtics, tie ball game at da half. Coach wants more toughness. I gotta step up." Yes during the game he Twitted. Needless to say his coach, Scott Skiles was a bit peeved. Still, the Bucks ended up winning the game.
You can't question the Power of the Twitt. Although while Twitter has its advantages, I can't help but think it could get ugly. I kept thinking of potential Twits. You know, if there was a Truth Serum Twitter. You had to Twitt what you were really doing. Instead of "Joe is watching the Office"...it'd be like "Joe is watching German Dominatrix Porn." The scandals, the potential taboo reveals, the fact we'd never look at some people the same again. Then you'd really the power of Twitter.
Check out a few examples of Fake Twitt's I thought of off the top of my head:
Dennis Rodman:
"Looking for a dress to wear. Wunder if I can pizz off more ppl today on Celeb Apprentice"
Charles Barkley:
"Feelin turrible after a night of binge drinking."
"Aw now that's turrible Kenny."
Jason Richardson: (Who actually does have Twitter:http://twitter.com/jrich23)
"Provin' u can go 90 and Twitt and be a good dad at the same time. While smokin a doob."
Jerry Jones:
"Checking the police blotter for a new safety."
Matt Jones:
"Cocaine is a hell of a drug. Good thing I play for the Jags otherwise I'd be fucked."
Randy Moss:
"Running over some bitch cop that isn't a stripper. Wuzzup wit that?"
T.O.:
"Watchin' a good romantic comedy. Sheddin' a few tears. Gonna' mirror watch in a few hours."
Vick:
"Settin' up da dog fightin' ring. Be there tonite my house 8 pm - Rover vs. Duke in a battle of the Greyhounds. But shh don't tell da cops."
Pete Rose:
"Going to the bookie. I got a good feeling about today."
Pacman Jones:
"Makin it rain."
Pacman Jones: (Five minutes later)
"Got arrested. Punched stripper in mouth. Again. Shit."
Pacman Jones: (Fifteen minutes later)
"Hell ya baby, booked and out clean a minute later. Love the justice system. Back to the strip club."
Pacman Jones: (Thirty minutes later)
"Got arrested. This time it wasn't my fault."
Alright the obligatory Pacman Jones joke should end it. I'll talk to you guys later and get some Final 4 thoughts out there as well. Until next time...
Well, add another thing to the list: Twitter. Because of the age we live in, things like Twitter grow from an unknown website to everyone's method of communication in a few months. Guarantee if you went up to someone a few months ago and told you them you like to Twitter, your average person would have recommended you go see a nerves doctor. Now everyone knows what Twitter and is doing it themselves.
"Flipping off the Xmas Tree."
Of course, the biggest proponents of Twitter have been celebrities and athletes. The growth of Twitter has been in direct relation to their use of it. Because really, they are the only people who's every move we care about. You already know what your friends are doing for the most part. Oh is it a Wednesday during the day? Ellard must be at work. You know, like every other day. But what exactly is Rainn Wilson up to? Let's check the ol' Twitt machine to find out!
For famous people Twitter is a new wave of communicating with their fans. Gone are the days when celebs/athletes would receive letters in the mail from their fans, maybe write a few back and that would be that. Now with Twitter not only can you communicate with your fans with a click of the button and a few written words, you can do it in real time. Shaq just landed in an airport in Memphis. He's pumped to play the Grizzlies. We know this because he Twittered us a few hours before the game. He also says if you greet him like a rockstar at the airpot, he's got a few free tickets he'll give away. Ah - a little bribery in order to feel like John Lennon. Nothing wrong with that.
Paul Pierce just used Twitter for this very reason today. In fact, this was the story that got me fascinated by the whole ordeal. A 5:12 (I feel like a cop - I wonder if Twitting could ever be used in a trial. Your honor may the record show he Twitted at - alright stay on task Gabe) he Twitted, "Change in schedule first 5 fan wit my jersey on at players parkin entrance get tik to todays game." He followed that up with, "aight on my way to arena b there at 430 with my jersey players entrance free tiket to game only got 5 left hurry up passcode is truth." So naturally when he came to the arena, a number of fans mobbed his Range Rover ala the Beatles.
Meanwhile, Charlie Villanueva isn't using his Twitting to become like the Beatles (although he does give away tickets through contests ala Casey Kasem). He also gives real time updates to his fans. Like really real time updates. During a game vs. the Celtics a few weeks back he Twitted the following, "In da locker room, snuck to post my twitt. We're playing the Celtics, tie ball game at da half. Coach wants more toughness. I gotta step up." Yes during the game he Twitted. Needless to say his coach, Scott Skiles was a bit peeved. Still, the Bucks ended up winning the game.
You can't question the Power of the Twitt. Although while Twitter has its advantages, I can't help but think it could get ugly. I kept thinking of potential Twits. You know, if there was a Truth Serum Twitter. You had to Twitt what you were really doing. Instead of "Joe is watching the Office"...it'd be like "Joe is watching German Dominatrix Porn." The scandals, the potential taboo reveals, the fact we'd never look at some people the same again. Then you'd really the power of Twitter.
Check out a few examples of Fake Twitt's I thought of off the top of my head:
Dennis Rodman:
"Looking for a dress to wear. Wunder if I can pizz off more ppl today on Celeb Apprentice"
Charles Barkley:
"Feelin turrible after a night of binge drinking."
Jason Richardson: (Who actually does have Twitter:http://twitter.com/jrich23)
"Provin' u can go 90 and Twitt and be a good dad at the same time. While smokin a doob."
Jerry Jones:
"Checking the police blotter for a new safety."
Matt Jones:
"Cocaine is a hell of a drug. Good thing I play for the Jags otherwise I'd be fucked."
Randy Moss:
"Running over some bitch cop that isn't a stripper. Wuzzup wit that?"
T.O.:
"Watchin' a good romantic comedy. Sheddin' a few tears. Gonna' mirror watch in a few hours."
Vick:
"Settin' up da dog fightin' ring. Be there tonite my house 8 pm - Rover vs. Duke in a battle of the Greyhounds. But shh don't tell da cops."
Pete Rose:
"Going to the bookie. I got a good feeling about today."
Pacman Jones:
"Makin it rain."
Pacman Jones: (Five minutes later)
"Got arrested. Punched stripper in mouth. Again. Shit."
Pacman Jones: (Fifteen minutes later)
"Hell ya baby, booked and out clean a minute later. Love the justice system. Back to the strip club."
Pacman Jones: (Thirty minutes later)
"Got arrested. This time it wasn't my fault."
Alright the obligatory Pacman Jones joke should end it. I'll talk to you guys later and get some Final 4 thoughts out there as well. Until next time...
Too Much Chalk
Today and yesterday the internet was littered with articles about how the 16 remaining teams in the NCAA Tournament were all from major programs. Check 'em out. I darez ya. Here's Pat Forde from ESPN and here's his colleague Andy Katz. Over at CBS Sportsline
Gary Parrish chimed in and here's articles from The Washington Post, The New York Times, and USA Today. In fact, if you do an article with the search term "Chalk, NCAA Tournament" under Google News, you get all sorts of results. Anyway, my point being this is far from an original topic. It's without a doubt the main storyline to come out of the first weekend of the NCAA Tournament. Yet it has to be said, and re-said, and re-re-said:
Way Too Much Chalk.
Yes, I know, I know, I'm echoing a number of voices who have already spoken (Although some of the analysts out there were in favor of the chalk). I don't care. I'm a little irked. Actually I'm more than a little irked. Cinderella didn't get invited to the ball this year and it sucks. Last year we discovered Davidson. Two years before that Cindy was George Mason. Before that it was UW-Milwaukee. You get the point. It was something we've been accustomed to in the NCAA Tournament. We'd have Cindy crash the party of 16 every year. For a few days people would fawn over the Cindy, go to her small campus, talk about her most famous alumni and generally indulge themselves in all her glory.
Not this year. No Cindy's. Arizona at the 12 seed is the highest remaining seeded team left. Guess what? Arizona is NOT a Cindy. She's a supermodel who had a down year and suddenly recovered just in time for the ball. Siena? They could have been our Cindy. They had all the qualities of a Cindy. Small school, small conference and spunky player who looks like he'd get crapped on in a Big East game (Ryan Rossiter for those counting at home). But they had to lose to Louisville. Damnit Siena, your Cindy story ended during the scene where the Fairy Godmother is turning you into a beautiful princess. Sadly, Terrence Williams plowed into the Fairy Godmother after dunking over her.
So now we are left with nothing I'm afraid. No Cindy. We have former Cindy's in Xavier and Gonzaga. However, they've been living the high life so long they don't remember what it's like wash floors with dirty rags. They are like 50 Cent because really 50 Cent can't make songs about being gangster anymore. He's lived in Connecticut for five years. And believe me, no one from Connecticut can make a song about being gangster. Sadly, no one is Cindy. She's peaced out for this year.
Perhaps I'll get over it. I'm sure I'll still watch the games this upcoming weekend (with a glimmer of hope that I can still win my bracket - but it's looking as likely as a Michael Moore/George W. Bush sitdown interview). But it won't be the same. Not without Cindy. It'd be like if Paul from The Wonder Years wasn't there? Was Paul a misfit? Yes. Should he even been in the same room as Kevin and Winnie? Probably not. Did we ever wonder, what the fuck is Kevin doing with this loser? YES. But we'd still miss him. That's Cindy. That's Davidson, or George Mason or even Gonzaga before they became cool.
You know what UNC is? They are someone named Bianca. They have millions of dollars, three Chevys before they turn 16 and a swimming pool bigger than Cindy's shanty. When it comes down to it, and you think about the American theme of underdogs and all those crappy movies you lived through as a child (Hello Mighty Ducks and Little Giants), We Need Cindy. We can't cheer for someone named Bianca, (unless you are one of Bianca's many, many minions). It's not in our blood.
Yes Bianca is hot, yes she's entertaining, yes she can throw down and play at a near NBA level. A few Biancas never hurt. But too many Biancas gets annoying. She's too perfect. No one likes Ms. Perfection. We have our own imperfections and hate it when teams become unstoppable (see: Patriots, New England). This is why the underdog story works. 99 percent of us out there are Cindys. So while Bianca is hot and perfect, she's not a Cindy.
And that kinda sucks. We'll miss ya Cindy, come back next year.
Way Too Much Chalk.
Yes, I know, I know, I'm echoing a number of voices who have already spoken (Although some of the analysts out there were in favor of the chalk). I don't care. I'm a little irked. Actually I'm more than a little irked. Cinderella didn't get invited to the ball this year and it sucks. Last year we discovered Davidson. Two years before that Cindy was George Mason. Before that it was UW-Milwaukee. You get the point. It was something we've been accustomed to in the NCAA Tournament. We'd have Cindy crash the party of 16 every year. For a few days people would fawn over the Cindy, go to her small campus, talk about her most famous alumni and generally indulge themselves in all her glory.
Not this year. No Cindy's. Arizona at the 12 seed is the highest remaining seeded team left. Guess what? Arizona is NOT a Cindy. She's a supermodel who had a down year and suddenly recovered just in time for the ball. Siena? They could have been our Cindy. They had all the qualities of a Cindy. Small school, small conference and spunky player who looks like he'd get crapped on in a Big East game (Ryan Rossiter for those counting at home). But they had to lose to Louisville. Damnit Siena, your Cindy story ended during the scene where the Fairy Godmother is turning you into a beautiful princess. Sadly, Terrence Williams plowed into the Fairy Godmother after dunking over her.
So now we are left with nothing I'm afraid. No Cindy. We have former Cindy's in Xavier and Gonzaga. However, they've been living the high life so long they don't remember what it's like wash floors with dirty rags. They are like 50 Cent because really 50 Cent can't make songs about being gangster anymore. He's lived in Connecticut for five years. And believe me, no one from Connecticut can make a song about being gangster. Sadly, no one is Cindy. She's peaced out for this year.
Perhaps I'll get over it. I'm sure I'll still watch the games this upcoming weekend (with a glimmer of hope that I can still win my bracket - but it's looking as likely as a Michael Moore/George W. Bush sitdown interview). But it won't be the same. Not without Cindy. It'd be like if Paul from The Wonder Years wasn't there? Was Paul a misfit? Yes. Should he even been in the same room as Kevin and Winnie? Probably not. Did we ever wonder, what the fuck is Kevin doing with this loser? YES. But we'd still miss him. That's Cindy. That's Davidson, or George Mason or even Gonzaga before they became cool.
You know what UNC is? They are someone named Bianca. They have millions of dollars, three Chevys before they turn 16 and a swimming pool bigger than Cindy's shanty. When it comes down to it, and you think about the American theme of underdogs and all those crappy movies you lived through as a child (Hello Mighty Ducks and Little Giants), We Need Cindy. We can't cheer for someone named Bianca, (unless you are one of Bianca's many, many minions). It's not in our blood.
Yes Bianca is hot, yes she's entertaining, yes she can throw down and play at a near NBA level. A few Biancas never hurt. But too many Biancas gets annoying. She's too perfect. No one likes Ms. Perfection. We have our own imperfections and hate it when teams become unstoppable (see: Patriots, New England). This is why the underdog story works. 99 percent of us out there are Cindys. So while Bianca is hot and perfect, she's not a Cindy.
And that kinda sucks. We'll miss ya Cindy, come back next year.
First round thoughts
Show of hands if your bracket is already in trouble?
Thought so. I got 23 of 32 in the first round with four Sweet 16 teams gone and one Elite 8 team finished (freaking FSU). Although it seems like others are worse off than I am. I know a kid who has two of his Final 4 teams already eliminated. Although, you have to expect that when you pick Cal and West Virginia in the Final 4. What are you thinking (Josh)? But then again, I'm not exactly looking like a genius myself. And I'm the sad sap who actually watches the shit. I digress - I still have my Final 4 intact and I'm sure by some messed up way there is a chance for me to win my pools.
Anyway, I love this time of year. It brings everyone together. Last night, I chatted up some drunk Rhode Islander last night at Patriot Place. When Siena's Ronald Moore hit a three to send the game into Double OT, we had a convo that went a little bit like this...
Me: HOLY SHIT THAT WAS AWESOME
Drunken Rhode Islander: DUDE I LOVE THIS TIME OF YEAR
Me: ME TOO
(Raises his mug)
DRI: (Realizing I don't have a beer) WHERE THE FUCK IS YOUR BEER?
Me: I don't know they haven't come yet
DRI: (Visibly upset) THIS EFFING BITCH NEEDS TO GET YOU A BEER, WHAT THE FUCK? (To passing waitress) HEY GET HIM A EFFING BEER
I had met the man literally five minutes prior and he quickly became one of my closest, personal friends. I kid you not - we talked for about 20 minutes and I'm pretty sure the only things of note we said were "I love this time of year." and "Me too." It was beautiful. Anyway so a few thoughts about the first round:
Never trust a team from Utah: Enough said. I'm never putting my money into the hands of Mormons ever again. I should have known better. Let's see a team of white mormans vs. a team of black kids from the streets. It doesn't take a Chris Rock to figure that one out. Dumb dumb dumb. Utah St. I wasn't as mad about because it was a close game - but still, I should have known better than to pick them to go to the Sweet 16.
FSU - FU: Really? Really Florida State? Talk about a team that looked uninspired. Down the stretch they let Wisconsin get back into the game when they had a chance to put the foot on the proverbial throat and finish off the Badgers. Also great D there on the winning shot.
Hail Hail!: That's right baby Michigan is BACK. A win today over Oklahoma and then they are really back! I love it. I'm so in love with it I cannot even begin to tell you. I'll admit I was a little scared down the stretch, but I never lost faith in the Wolverines. Sure, Michigan football might be in the shitter, but Michigan basketball is back on the map. With John Beilein at the helm this is merely on the beginning. Clemson couldn't solve the 1-3-1 and it was a site to see. I mean everyone loves to hate on the Big 10, but right now it's look pretty good with Michigan over Clemson and Wisconsin over Florida State. Which leads to my next point...
ACC overrated: Am I the only one who thinks the ACC is overrated? I guess we'll truly find out when Duke and UNC play better competition but let's break it down. They are 3-4. Two of the wins are Duke and Carolina over a 15 and a 16 seed. The only real impressive win is Maryland over Cal. BC gets out-played down the stretch by USC (also nice coaching Al Skinner - How do you not take out Josh Southern, who was getting abused by Taj Gibson?), Wisconsin beats FSU, Michigan beats Clemson and oh yes...Wake gets blown out by Cleveland St. Here's a team that was ranked Number 1 earlier in the year, and they looked pathetic against Cleveland St. Cleveland freaking St. Glad I didn't pick them to go farther than the Sweet 16.
ND State Love: I have no regrets about picking North Dakota State folks. It was a tight game all the way and even in the end the Bison were down by six with a minute and a half left. How about Ben Woodside going for 37 and doing the best he can to try to pull the upset? In the end, the Jayhawks had too much, but great effort by the Bison. If a few more shots had fallen for them then who knows?
Player of the First Round: I'm giving it to Ben Woodside - 37 points against Kansas is impressive
Game of the First Round: Siena-Ohio State - with FSU/Wisconsin a close second with Oklahoma State and Tennessee in third.
Moment of the First Round: Ronald Moore's three to win the game.
Disappointment of the First Round: Tie - Florida State for blowing it against Wisconsin and Wake Forrest for not even showing up against Cleveland State.
Looking ahead: Lots of great potential storylines heading forward. The Cleveland St-Arizona game will be interesting to watch. It will be interesting to see if any of the one seeds get tested. A few of them went full throttle against their 16s (Carolina, UConn), the others stepped their foot off the gas until the end. It won't be that easy for these guys this round. Can we see the unthinkable 8/9 over 1 upset? I say the most likely spot is Oklahoma St. over Pitt. Anyway good stuff - hope you are enjoying the tourney! Talk to you soon!
Thought so. I got 23 of 32 in the first round with four Sweet 16 teams gone and one Elite 8 team finished (freaking FSU). Although it seems like others are worse off than I am. I know a kid who has two of his Final 4 teams already eliminated. Although, you have to expect that when you pick Cal and West Virginia in the Final 4. What are you thinking (Josh)? But then again, I'm not exactly looking like a genius myself. And I'm the sad sap who actually watches the shit. I digress - I still have my Final 4 intact and I'm sure by some messed up way there is a chance for me to win my pools.
Anyway, I love this time of year. It brings everyone together. Last night, I chatted up some drunk Rhode Islander last night at Patriot Place. When Siena's Ronald Moore hit a three to send the game into Double OT, we had a convo that went a little bit like this...
Me: HOLY SHIT THAT WAS AWESOME
Drunken Rhode Islander: DUDE I LOVE THIS TIME OF YEAR
Me: ME TOO
(Raises his mug)
DRI: (Realizing I don't have a beer) WHERE THE FUCK IS YOUR BEER?
Me: I don't know they haven't come yet
DRI: (Visibly upset) THIS EFFING BITCH NEEDS TO GET YOU A BEER, WHAT THE FUCK? (To passing waitress) HEY GET HIM A EFFING BEER
I had met the man literally five minutes prior and he quickly became one of my closest, personal friends. I kid you not - we talked for about 20 minutes and I'm pretty sure the only things of note we said were "I love this time of year." and "Me too." It was beautiful. Anyway so a few thoughts about the first round:
Never trust a team from Utah: Enough said. I'm never putting my money into the hands of Mormons ever again. I should have known better. Let's see a team of white mormans vs. a team of black kids from the streets. It doesn't take a Chris Rock to figure that one out. Dumb dumb dumb. Utah St. I wasn't as mad about because it was a close game - but still, I should have known better than to pick them to go to the Sweet 16.
FSU - FU: Really? Really Florida State? Talk about a team that looked uninspired. Down the stretch they let Wisconsin get back into the game when they had a chance to put the foot on the proverbial throat and finish off the Badgers. Also great D there on the winning shot.
Hail Hail!: That's right baby Michigan is BACK. A win today over Oklahoma and then they are really back! I love it. I'm so in love with it I cannot even begin to tell you. I'll admit I was a little scared down the stretch, but I never lost faith in the Wolverines. Sure, Michigan football might be in the shitter, but Michigan basketball is back on the map. With John Beilein at the helm this is merely on the beginning. Clemson couldn't solve the 1-3-1 and it was a site to see. I mean everyone loves to hate on the Big 10, but right now it's look pretty good with Michigan over Clemson and Wisconsin over Florida State. Which leads to my next point...
ACC overrated: Am I the only one who thinks the ACC is overrated? I guess we'll truly find out when Duke and UNC play better competition but let's break it down. They are 3-4. Two of the wins are Duke and Carolina over a 15 and a 16 seed. The only real impressive win is Maryland over Cal. BC gets out-played down the stretch by USC (also nice coaching Al Skinner - How do you not take out Josh Southern, who was getting abused by Taj Gibson?), Wisconsin beats FSU, Michigan beats Clemson and oh yes...Wake gets blown out by Cleveland St. Here's a team that was ranked Number 1 earlier in the year, and they looked pathetic against Cleveland St. Cleveland freaking St. Glad I didn't pick them to go farther than the Sweet 16.
ND State Love: I have no regrets about picking North Dakota State folks. It was a tight game all the way and even in the end the Bison were down by six with a minute and a half left. How about Ben Woodside going for 37 and doing the best he can to try to pull the upset? In the end, the Jayhawks had too much, but great effort by the Bison. If a few more shots had fallen for them then who knows?
Player of the First Round: I'm giving it to Ben Woodside - 37 points against Kansas is impressive
Game of the First Round: Siena-Ohio State - with FSU/Wisconsin a close second with Oklahoma State and Tennessee in third.
Moment of the First Round: Ronald Moore's three to win the game.
Disappointment of the First Round: Tie - Florida State for blowing it against Wisconsin and Wake Forrest for not even showing up against Cleveland State.
Looking ahead: Lots of great potential storylines heading forward. The Cleveland St-Arizona game will be interesting to watch. It will be interesting to see if any of the one seeds get tested. A few of them went full throttle against their 16s (Carolina, UConn), the others stepped their foot off the gas until the end. It won't be that easy for these guys this round. Can we see the unthinkable 8/9 over 1 upset? I say the most likely spot is Oklahoma St. over Pitt. Anyway good stuff - hope you are enjoying the tourney! Talk to you soon!
I <3 The Madness (Plus my bracket for the world to mock at a later point)
For the record, this will be one of those sappy, dorky articles I'll
laugh about in years to come. I can't help it. When it comes to March
Madness, I turn into a little girl at a Jonas Brothers concert.
I love it. I truly adore it. In fact, I really can't think of a time of year in sports where I'm in a better mood. Well, probably during the NFL season when the Pats are a good team. That's it though. Nothing pales in comparison to the following three weeks when a nation of sports freaks become obsessed with a bunch of 18-21 year old (or in the case of the Utah St. Center Gary Wilkinson, 26 years old. You know, because of the Mormon thing) kids playing a game.
Yes of course I'm talking about March Madness. I'm not really sure what marketing genius came up with that simple moniker, but it is in fact, brilliant. It really is madness. Buzzer beaters. No name schools arising from nowhere to become household names. 20 year old baby face kids becoming legends. Crowds all across the country actually influencing a game. Gus Johnson's brilliant jovial voice getting you even more excited. (GONZAGA...THE SLIPPER STILL FITS). It truly is insanity. Princeton beating UCLA. Bucknell beating Kansas. Mario Chalmers hitting a three to save his team's season. I could go on forever.
College basketball has always been about one thing, and one thing only: pure emotion. Jim Valvano running around like a chicken with his head cut off looking for someone to huge. The face of Adam Morrison as he bawls after losing to UCLA. You get the idea. Nothing exemplifies this emotion more than the big dance. This is why I love it. When you watch the pro game - as entertaining as it is - you can't help but think: "Even if these guys lose, they win. They are making more money than God." In college basketball, 99 percent of the guys out there are not going to the NBA. They're actually playing for pride, purpose and to (shudder the thought) actually win the game. There's no record label, no shoe deal (well except with the schools themselves but we'll surpass that little nugget) and no lifeless crowd which needs gimmicks to generate excitement. It's all real.
Add in the fact, March Madness is the only sporting event (in America...I can't account for cricket), that is truly an all day affair, then you understand why I love. I can't believe I have to work tomorrow and Friday. The past few years, I've literally sat down at 12 and pretty much watched all the way up until 11. I don't care what anyone says, this to me is an ideal day. I love when they shift between games. You've got Greg Gumbel going back-and-forth like a child choosing on which divorced parent s/he loves more. It's awesome. Here's Clemson-Wisconsin. WAIT. Michigan State-Tennessee is a lot better. We'll go with that. WAIT...we'll go with Texas-Arizona. Oh I can't choose! They're all good.
I'll never forget the first time I became hooked on March Madness. The year was 1995. Rock and roll music was still encompassed by loners who hated themselves, Tom Hanks was banging out more hits than Jack Nicholson and Al Pacino combined and UMass basketball was on top of the sporting world (in Massachusetts...well sort of, college sports has never really been that big here). Anyway, John Calipari was head coach and Marcus Camby was the main man. In 1995, they reached the Elite Eight as a number two seed, only to lose to a guy named "Big Country" and Oklahoma State. I remember going into school the next day, talking with everyone about what a tragedy it was for a guy named "Big Country" (Bryant Reeves...who was picked in the 1995 draft right after Kevin Garnett strangely enough) to beat UMass.
The next year was magical for UMass, riding the catchphrase "refuse to lose," they went an astounding 31-1 leading up to the tournament. They went all the way to the Final 4 where they lost to eventual champion Kentucky in a pretty good game. Even in Boston, where pro-sports rule the roost, I'll never forget the passion, how people hung on to every minute of every game during this mini UMass run. As Steve Buckley once said during the UMass 100-years documentary, "John Calipari and the team did what every coach before and since has tried to do it at UMass. And that's bring the team inside Route 128." It's so true.
Sadly years later we'd find out Camby accepted money from a sports agency and UMass' final four run would be nullified by the NCAA. Still, UMass always holds a place in my heart for really turning me onto the glory and passion of college basketball.
Of course, the other big reason we all love Madness is because of the brackets. Every year, we all fill these stupid things out with a glimmer of hope that perhaps this is finally our year to win our pool. I know these are my sentiments every year.Plus, filling out the brackets allows for conversation pieces like, Hey who's your double digit Sweet 16 team? or What's your 12 over 5?. Here's my one piece of advice though: Don't get mad when Judy from Accounts Payable wins the bracket despite the fact she's never seen a college hoops game in her life. That's just how these things work.
With that being said, I'll debut my glorious bracket for everyone to mock, tease and degrade once it's been proven that I have no idea what I'm talking about. WOOHOO.
Alright...
Midwest Region
1. Louisville over 16. Morehead St. - Morehead St. is more known for its hilarious name than its b-ball program
9. Siena over 8. Ohio St. - Even though this is in Dayton, I have to rep the MAAC
12. 'Zona over 5. Utah - I have a rule where I can't pick three Mormon teams a year - Utah gets left out sadly.
4. Wake Forest over 13. Cleveland St. - Wake is just way too talented for a team in the Horizon League
6. West Virginia over 11. Dayton - Even without Pittsnogle I love West Virginia
14. North Dakota State over 3. Kansas - Yup you read that correctly. Listen, I feel a 14 over a 3 is going to happen and did you see the way ND State reacted during the selection program? I guarantee Ben Woodside hits a three pointer to win it. Just wait, when this happens, you can all worship at the altar of Perna.
7. Boston College over 10. USC - I flip-flopped on this one a bunch of times, but I got to believe Tyrese Rice wills his team to at least one victory.
2. Michigan St. over 15. Robert Morris - As much as I'd love to see Robert Morris vs. Stephen Austin in the all "Someone's Full Name For a College Final," I can't see it happening.
1. Louisville over 9. Siena - Alas the dream of seeing a MAAC team reach the Sweet 16 is put on hold for another year.
4. Wake Forest over 12. "Zona - 'Zona has a classic "people don't think we should be here so we'll win one game and then lose brutally" feel to them.
6. West Virginia over 14. ND State - As much as I'd love to see the Bison (singular, not plural) reach the Sweet 16, it's as likely as Jay Bilas-Dick Vitale handshake.
2. Michigan St. over 7. BC - If I had little faith in BC to beat USC, what makes you think I'll have them beat Michigan St.?
1. Louisville over 4. Wake Forest - If this were earlier in the year, I'd totally go with Wake, but they've fallen off recently.
2. Michigan St. over 6. West Virginia - Michigan St. has a coach by the name of Tom Izzo. Not sure if you've heard of him, but his four FInal 4 appearances make me think he's pretty decent.
1. Louisville over 2. Michigan St. - Pitino is headed back in the Final 4 baby! This calls for my favorite Pitino moment ever.
West Region
1. UConn over 16. Chattanooga - Although I'm sure Ken Krayese is a big Mocs fan these days
8. BYU over 9. Texas A&M - Fun fact: This exact game in this exact slot was played last year. Last year I picked A&M and was right, this year I think the Cougars take it.
5. Purdue over 12. Northern Iowa - Oh how the might Missouri Valley has fallen. They have one team and its a 12 seed. Ouch. I remember when they had like five teams in the dance.
4. Washington over 13. Mississippi St. - Washington's actually pretty good - but because they play in the Pac-10, they are more ignored than an ugly chick on homecoming. Okay, maybe not that badly, but still, I doubt anyone knows anything about Washington basketball outside of the school's fans.
11. Utah St. over 6. Marquette - I've heard about enough people making this upset pick where I'm starting to think if Marquette wins it'd be the real upset.
3. Mizzou over 14. Cornell - If it was any other team in this spot than Cornell I would have gone with the upset. But I really can't pick Cornell to win. I just can't. Sorry Dr. Strudler.
7. Cal over 10. Maryland - Maryland was seeded way too high as a 10 seed. I think. Well we'll see.
2. Memphis over 15. CSU Northridge - You Matadors fans can go back to smoking weed after this one is done.
1. UConn over 8. BYU - I don't have the balls to pick an 8/9 over a 1, but if I did, this would be it. (Yes I realize I picked North Dakota St. to win...I don't care)
5. Purdue over 4. Washington - I know I slobbered all over Washington, but watching E-Twaun Moore and Robbie Hummel tear up Ohio St., I've been sold on the Boilermakers.
11. Utah St. over 3. Mizzou - Ding, ding, ding, ladies and gents your first double digit Sweet 16 team.
2. Memphis over 7. Cal - Coach Cal beats up on Cal. Awesome word play.
1. UConn over 5. Purdue - I originally had Purdue winning this one, but I changed my mind. It'll be close though.
2. Memphis over 11. Utah St. - The dream dies for the Aggies. Gary Wilkinson goes back to his 9-5 life, his wife and kids. Got to pay the mortgage somehow. (He's 26 remember?)
2. Memphis over 1. UConn - If UConn makes it here, (which I'm still not certain they do), I don't see them beating the Tigers.
East Region
1. Pitt over 16. E. Tennessee St. - Out of the three directional schools in the big dance this year, I'll admit Eastern Tennessee St. has the zaniest name of them all. It's like the Diet Cherry Chocolate Dr. Pepper of the group.
9. Tennessee over 8. Oklahoma St. - Hey, what if Tennesse played Eastern Tennessee St. in the battle of Tennessee - (while Memphis just laughs non-stop at the notion of being left out)
5. Florida State over 12. Wisconsin - Unlike 'Zona, Wisconsin is not one of those bubble teams who I see winning a game just to spite all the haters.
4. Xavier over 13. Portland St. - This was actually the one 13 over 4 I was considering before I re-considered. Eh. Just can't go with both them and ND State.
11. VCU over 6. UCLA - I hate picking this one because it's become very chic, but I really do like the Rams chances to win.
3. 'Nova over 14. American - It's in Philadelphia. Enough said.
7. Texas over 10. Minnesota - Good for Minnesota getting back in the tournament. However, much like Baylor last year, I see it ending fairly quickly.
2. Duke over 15. Binghamton - I told my friend from Marist, I'd love to see Binghamton, Siena, Cornell and Syracuse in an all Upstate New York Final 4. One day my friends one day.
1. Pitt over 9. Tennessee - I could see either the Vols or Cowboys playing the Panthers pretty tightly.
5. Florida State over 4. Xavier - I'm not really impressed by the X-Men at all recently.
3. 'Nova over VCU - It's in Philadelphia. Enough said.
2. Duke over 7. Texas - People who want to see another recent, classic second round Duke exit will be disappointed. This team is too good for that.
5. Florida State over 1. Pitt - No, this year will not have four number one's in the Final 4 again. I guarantee it. (Yes I'm more than willing to eat my words later). Toney Douglas goes wild here.
3. Nova over 2. Duke - It'll be a tight one, but I really like this 'Nova team.
3. Nova over 5. Florida State - Like I said, I really like this 'Nova team.
Last but not least...
South Region
1. UNC over 16. Radford - A school named after Rad Radford - infamous mid 1990s WWF wrestling star. Well now I really am starting to think I can have a college named after me.
9. Butler over 8. LSU - The first non PIG game of the tournament. I kind of thought Butler got a raw deal, they lost five games all year.
12. Western Kentucky over 5. Illinois - Another "upset" pick that's become very trendy.
4. "Zaga over 13. Akron - Little known fact, Akron is the hometown of LeBron James. (Well they needed something positive since they're going to be hammered by 'Zaga)
6. Arizona St. over 11. Temple - Dionte Christmas is a great name and an even better player, but ASU was actually really good this year.
3. Syracuse over 14. Stephen F. Austin - And that's the bottom line...cause Jonny Flynn said so.
10. Michigan over 7. Clemson - Hail to the victors! Bitch.
2. Oklahoma over 15. Morgan St. - Blake Griffin could probably outscore the entire Morgan St. lineup ala Gilbert Arenas vs. Duke.
1. UNC over 9. Butler - With or without Lawson, this shouldn't be close.
4. 'Zaga over 12. Western Kentucky - This is 'Zaga's easiest path to the Sweet 16, there are no more excuses for the Bulldogs this year. NONE I SAY.
6. Arizona St. over 3. Syracuse - This is more or less even, if 'Cuse doesn't go on that amazing run in the BE tourney then no way they are a three seed.
10. Michigan over 2. Oklahoma - Folks, it can't all be chalk can it? Plus it's John Beilein. Hail to the Victors? Hopefully.
1. UNC over 4. 'Zaga - Zaga is really good and if Ty Lawson isn't healthy, everything could change. However, I'm going with healthy and I'm going with the Tarheels. Flair would be so proud.
6. Arizona St. over 10. Michigan - The only thing stopping me from putting the Wolverines in the Elite 8 is my last shred of common sense.
1. UNC over 6. Arizona St. - Again, Lawson's toe could change everything. But if he's healthy, no team is capable of stopping them.
FINAL 4 - Yippee, the column is finally almost over!
1. Louisville over 2. Memphis - In the battle of angry Italian coaches, it's Providence's hero overtaking Western Mass' hero in possibly the game of the tournament.
1. UNC over 3. Villanova - 'Nova is one of those strong, tough, traditionally annoying Big East teams. But at full strength UNC is a special team.
Championship Game
1. UNC over 1. Louisville (88-81) - Hansbrough goes out on top, gives people outside of North Carolina another reason to hate Roy Williams. (Of course knowing my luck with predictions lately, Radford will pull the greatest upset in tourney history tomorrow and I'll cry myself to sleep)
Thanks everybody. Come back soon!
I love it. I truly adore it. In fact, I really can't think of a time of year in sports where I'm in a better mood. Well, probably during the NFL season when the Pats are a good team. That's it though. Nothing pales in comparison to the following three weeks when a nation of sports freaks become obsessed with a bunch of 18-21 year old (or in the case of the Utah St. Center Gary Wilkinson, 26 years old. You know, because of the Mormon thing) kids playing a game.
Yes of course I'm talking about March Madness. I'm not really sure what marketing genius came up with that simple moniker, but it is in fact, brilliant. It really is madness. Buzzer beaters. No name schools arising from nowhere to become household names. 20 year old baby face kids becoming legends. Crowds all across the country actually influencing a game. Gus Johnson's brilliant jovial voice getting you even more excited. (GONZAGA...THE SLIPPER STILL FITS). It truly is insanity. Princeton beating UCLA. Bucknell beating Kansas. Mario Chalmers hitting a three to save his team's season. I could go on forever.
College basketball has always been about one thing, and one thing only: pure emotion. Jim Valvano running around like a chicken with his head cut off looking for someone to huge. The face of Adam Morrison as he bawls after losing to UCLA. You get the idea. Nothing exemplifies this emotion more than the big dance. This is why I love it. When you watch the pro game - as entertaining as it is - you can't help but think: "Even if these guys lose, they win. They are making more money than God." In college basketball, 99 percent of the guys out there are not going to the NBA. They're actually playing for pride, purpose and to (shudder the thought) actually win the game. There's no record label, no shoe deal (well except with the schools themselves but we'll surpass that little nugget) and no lifeless crowd which needs gimmicks to generate excitement. It's all real.
Add in the fact, March Madness is the only sporting event (in America...I can't account for cricket), that is truly an all day affair, then you understand why I love. I can't believe I have to work tomorrow and Friday. The past few years, I've literally sat down at 12 and pretty much watched all the way up until 11. I don't care what anyone says, this to me is an ideal day. I love when they shift between games. You've got Greg Gumbel going back-and-forth like a child choosing on which divorced parent s/he loves more. It's awesome. Here's Clemson-Wisconsin. WAIT. Michigan State-Tennessee is a lot better. We'll go with that. WAIT...we'll go with Texas-Arizona. Oh I can't choose! They're all good.
I'll never forget the first time I became hooked on March Madness. The year was 1995. Rock and roll music was still encompassed by loners who hated themselves, Tom Hanks was banging out more hits than Jack Nicholson and Al Pacino combined and UMass basketball was on top of the sporting world (in Massachusetts...well sort of, college sports has never really been that big here). Anyway, John Calipari was head coach and Marcus Camby was the main man. In 1995, they reached the Elite Eight as a number two seed, only to lose to a guy named "Big Country" and Oklahoma State. I remember going into school the next day, talking with everyone about what a tragedy it was for a guy named "Big Country" (Bryant Reeves...who was picked in the 1995 draft right after Kevin Garnett strangely enough) to beat UMass.
The next year was magical for UMass, riding the catchphrase "refuse to lose," they went an astounding 31-1 leading up to the tournament. They went all the way to the Final 4 where they lost to eventual champion Kentucky in a pretty good game. Even in Boston, where pro-sports rule the roost, I'll never forget the passion, how people hung on to every minute of every game during this mini UMass run. As Steve Buckley once said during the UMass 100-years documentary, "John Calipari and the team did what every coach before and since has tried to do it at UMass. And that's bring the team inside Route 128." It's so true.
Sadly years later we'd find out Camby accepted money from a sports agency and UMass' final four run would be nullified by the NCAA. Still, UMass always holds a place in my heart for really turning me onto the glory and passion of college basketball.
Of course, the other big reason we all love Madness is because of the brackets. Every year, we all fill these stupid things out with a glimmer of hope that perhaps this is finally our year to win our pool. I know these are my sentiments every year.Plus, filling out the brackets allows for conversation pieces like, Hey who's your double digit Sweet 16 team? or What's your 12 over 5?. Here's my one piece of advice though: Don't get mad when Judy from Accounts Payable wins the bracket despite the fact she's never seen a college hoops game in her life. That's just how these things work.
With that being said, I'll debut my glorious bracket for everyone to mock, tease and degrade once it's been proven that I have no idea what I'm talking about. WOOHOO.
Alright...
Midwest Region
1. Louisville over 16. Morehead St. - Morehead St. is more known for its hilarious name than its b-ball program
9. Siena over 8. Ohio St. - Even though this is in Dayton, I have to rep the MAAC
12. 'Zona over 5. Utah - I have a rule where I can't pick three Mormon teams a year - Utah gets left out sadly.
4. Wake Forest over 13. Cleveland St. - Wake is just way too talented for a team in the Horizon League
6. West Virginia over 11. Dayton - Even without Pittsnogle I love West Virginia
14. North Dakota State over 3. Kansas - Yup you read that correctly. Listen, I feel a 14 over a 3 is going to happen and did you see the way ND State reacted during the selection program? I guarantee Ben Woodside hits a three pointer to win it. Just wait, when this happens, you can all worship at the altar of Perna.
7. Boston College over 10. USC - I flip-flopped on this one a bunch of times, but I got to believe Tyrese Rice wills his team to at least one victory.
2. Michigan St. over 15. Robert Morris - As much as I'd love to see Robert Morris vs. Stephen Austin in the all "Someone's Full Name For a College Final," I can't see it happening.
1. Louisville over 9. Siena - Alas the dream of seeing a MAAC team reach the Sweet 16 is put on hold for another year.
4. Wake Forest over 12. "Zona - 'Zona has a classic "people don't think we should be here so we'll win one game and then lose brutally" feel to them.
6. West Virginia over 14. ND State - As much as I'd love to see the Bison (singular, not plural) reach the Sweet 16, it's as likely as Jay Bilas-Dick Vitale handshake.
2. Michigan St. over 7. BC - If I had little faith in BC to beat USC, what makes you think I'll have them beat Michigan St.?
1. Louisville over 4. Wake Forest - If this were earlier in the year, I'd totally go with Wake, but they've fallen off recently.
2. Michigan St. over 6. West Virginia - Michigan St. has a coach by the name of Tom Izzo. Not sure if you've heard of him, but his four FInal 4 appearances make me think he's pretty decent.
1. Louisville over 2. Michigan St. - Pitino is headed back in the Final 4 baby! This calls for my favorite Pitino moment ever.
West Region
1. UConn over 16. Chattanooga - Although I'm sure Ken Krayese is a big Mocs fan these days
8. BYU over 9. Texas A&M - Fun fact: This exact game in this exact slot was played last year. Last year I picked A&M and was right, this year I think the Cougars take it.
5. Purdue over 12. Northern Iowa - Oh how the might Missouri Valley has fallen. They have one team and its a 12 seed. Ouch. I remember when they had like five teams in the dance.
4. Washington over 13. Mississippi St. - Washington's actually pretty good - but because they play in the Pac-10, they are more ignored than an ugly chick on homecoming. Okay, maybe not that badly, but still, I doubt anyone knows anything about Washington basketball outside of the school's fans.
11. Utah St. over 6. Marquette - I've heard about enough people making this upset pick where I'm starting to think if Marquette wins it'd be the real upset.
3. Mizzou over 14. Cornell - If it was any other team in this spot than Cornell I would have gone with the upset. But I really can't pick Cornell to win. I just can't. Sorry Dr. Strudler.
7. Cal over 10. Maryland - Maryland was seeded way too high as a 10 seed. I think. Well we'll see.
2. Memphis over 15. CSU Northridge - You Matadors fans can go back to smoking weed after this one is done.
1. UConn over 8. BYU - I don't have the balls to pick an 8/9 over a 1, but if I did, this would be it. (Yes I realize I picked North Dakota St. to win...I don't care)
5. Purdue over 4. Washington - I know I slobbered all over Washington, but watching E-Twaun Moore and Robbie Hummel tear up Ohio St., I've been sold on the Boilermakers.
11. Utah St. over 3. Mizzou - Ding, ding, ding, ladies and gents your first double digit Sweet 16 team.
2. Memphis over 7. Cal - Coach Cal beats up on Cal. Awesome word play.
1. UConn over 5. Purdue - I originally had Purdue winning this one, but I changed my mind. It'll be close though.
2. Memphis over 11. Utah St. - The dream dies for the Aggies. Gary Wilkinson goes back to his 9-5 life, his wife and kids. Got to pay the mortgage somehow. (He's 26 remember?)
2. Memphis over 1. UConn - If UConn makes it here, (which I'm still not certain they do), I don't see them beating the Tigers.
East Region
1. Pitt over 16. E. Tennessee St. - Out of the three directional schools in the big dance this year, I'll admit Eastern Tennessee St. has the zaniest name of them all. It's like the Diet Cherry Chocolate Dr. Pepper of the group.
9. Tennessee over 8. Oklahoma St. - Hey, what if Tennesse played Eastern Tennessee St. in the battle of Tennessee - (while Memphis just laughs non-stop at the notion of being left out)
5. Florida State over 12. Wisconsin - Unlike 'Zona, Wisconsin is not one of those bubble teams who I see winning a game just to spite all the haters.
4. Xavier over 13. Portland St. - This was actually the one 13 over 4 I was considering before I re-considered. Eh. Just can't go with both them and ND State.
11. VCU over 6. UCLA - I hate picking this one because it's become very chic, but I really do like the Rams chances to win.
3. 'Nova over 14. American - It's in Philadelphia. Enough said.
7. Texas over 10. Minnesota - Good for Minnesota getting back in the tournament. However, much like Baylor last year, I see it ending fairly quickly.
2. Duke over 15. Binghamton - I told my friend from Marist, I'd love to see Binghamton, Siena, Cornell and Syracuse in an all Upstate New York Final 4. One day my friends one day.
1. Pitt over 9. Tennessee - I could see either the Vols or Cowboys playing the Panthers pretty tightly.
5. Florida State over 4. Xavier - I'm not really impressed by the X-Men at all recently.
3. 'Nova over VCU - It's in Philadelphia. Enough said.
2. Duke over 7. Texas - People who want to see another recent, classic second round Duke exit will be disappointed. This team is too good for that.
5. Florida State over 1. Pitt - No, this year will not have four number one's in the Final 4 again. I guarantee it. (Yes I'm more than willing to eat my words later). Toney Douglas goes wild here.
3. Nova over 2. Duke - It'll be a tight one, but I really like this 'Nova team.
3. Nova over 5. Florida State - Like I said, I really like this 'Nova team.
Last but not least...
South Region
1. UNC over 16. Radford - A school named after Rad Radford - infamous mid 1990s WWF wrestling star. Well now I really am starting to think I can have a college named after me.
9. Butler over 8. LSU - The first non PIG game of the tournament. I kind of thought Butler got a raw deal, they lost five games all year.
12. Western Kentucky over 5. Illinois - Another "upset" pick that's become very trendy.
4. "Zaga over 13. Akron - Little known fact, Akron is the hometown of LeBron James. (Well they needed something positive since they're going to be hammered by 'Zaga)
6. Arizona St. over 11. Temple - Dionte Christmas is a great name and an even better player, but ASU was actually really good this year.
3. Syracuse over 14. Stephen F. Austin - And that's the bottom line...cause Jonny Flynn said so.
10. Michigan over 7. Clemson - Hail to the victors! Bitch.
2. Oklahoma over 15. Morgan St. - Blake Griffin could probably outscore the entire Morgan St. lineup ala Gilbert Arenas vs. Duke.
1. UNC over 9. Butler - With or without Lawson, this shouldn't be close.
4. 'Zaga over 12. Western Kentucky - This is 'Zaga's easiest path to the Sweet 16, there are no more excuses for the Bulldogs this year. NONE I SAY.
6. Arizona St. over 3. Syracuse - This is more or less even, if 'Cuse doesn't go on that amazing run in the BE tourney then no way they are a three seed.
10. Michigan over 2. Oklahoma - Folks, it can't all be chalk can it? Plus it's John Beilein. Hail to the Victors? Hopefully.
1. UNC over 4. 'Zaga - Zaga is really good and if Ty Lawson isn't healthy, everything could change. However, I'm going with healthy and I'm going with the Tarheels. Flair would be so proud.
6. Arizona St. over 10. Michigan - The only thing stopping me from putting the Wolverines in the Elite 8 is my last shred of common sense.
1. UNC over 6. Arizona St. - Again, Lawson's toe could change everything. But if he's healthy, no team is capable of stopping them.
FINAL 4 - Yippee, the column is finally almost over!
1. Louisville over 2. Memphis - In the battle of angry Italian coaches, it's Providence's hero overtaking Western Mass' hero in possibly the game of the tournament.
1. UNC over 3. Villanova - 'Nova is one of those strong, tough, traditionally annoying Big East teams. But at full strength UNC is a special team.
Championship Game
1. UNC over 1. Louisville (88-81) - Hansbrough goes out on top, gives people outside of North Carolina another reason to hate Roy Williams. (Of course knowing my luck with predictions lately, Radford will pull the greatest upset in tourney history tomorrow and I'll cry myself to sleep)
Thanks everybody. Come back soon!
Team of the Week: Rio Grande Valley Vipers
THAT'S RIGHT. It's back. I had to bring it back. Team of the Week, TOW if you will, was/is our most popular feature here at Rec-Room All Stars. Shit, it's our only feature. When it was gone I got crazy amounts of emails. "Gabe when is the TOW coming back?" "Gabe we miss the TOW!" "Gabe you suck at life. Go talk a long walk into the ocean." Okay, I didn't get any emails. No one noticed it was gone. Anyway I decided to bring it back for now. I'm not sure if it'll be on a weekly basis or what. I'll try to do it as much as I can. I love doing it and I think it's fun - but it is pretty time consuming.
So for our introduction back I decided to pick a team for one sole reason. It's an NBDL team and it has one of my favorite players of all time on it. Back in college, my Foxes had this kid by the name of Jared Jordan. If you saw this kid you'd think one thing: walk-on. Six foot nothing, small frame and goofy demeanor - he looked like Howdy Doody trying to play against the Harlem Globetrotters. However, once he stepped on the court it was a different story. He was like John Stockton. To quote Sidney Deane, "he could pull passes out of his ass." It was an awesome to watch this short, goofy, white kid have his way with the taller, more athletic opposition. Anyway, Jared lives in Marist folklore. Considering Marist just finished one their worst seasons ever, I figured I'd bring it back to the old days a bit. Perhaps seeing the Jordan face will lift my spirits.
These days, Jordan plays for a team named the Rio Grande Valley Vipers in the NBDL. So they are your team of the week.
The reason I became a Marist basketball fan.
Pretty standard mascot. I like the name Vipers. I wonder why no major sports team has taken that name yet. It's certainly a hell of a lot better than Thunder. What the NBA should've done is taken Vipers, given them to Oklahoma City and given Thunder to Rio Grande Valley. Let's be honest, do we care more about our D-League team or our NBA team. If you asked me which I thought was the minor league team and which was the big leagues, between Vipers and Thunder, I'd most certainly pick Vipers. Thunder may in fact be the worst name in all of professional sports. The thunder can't kill you. It's not dangerous. It's just loud and scary if you are like five years old.
I'm not going to lie. I had to look up where the Rio Grande Valley is. If I recall correctly, Rio Grande Valley is a level in the old Oregon Trail game. In fact, I'm going to look that up now...waits, waits, waits....okay, I can't find any information. If you know, please pass that along. Rio Grande Valley is in South Texas so actually I'm not sure how it could have been in the old Oregon Trail game. Whatever. I feel like it was.
Other than Jordan, I actually don't know a single player on the Vipers. Usually on these NBDL teams I remember a few guys. I'm a pretty big fan of college hoops, so often I'll be like, "oh right I remember him, Kevin Pittsnogle, the big goofy guy from West Virginia." Not this time. Jawad Williams played at UNC and sounds vaguely familiar. I think he was on the UNC '05 National Championship team. I remember there was Marvin Williams and another Williams, I'm pretty sure it was Jawad. (Confirmed by Wikipedia). Now that I think about it, I really only remember the goofy, white players from college hoops. Jordan, Pittsnogle, Gerry MacNamara (I wonder what he's up to these days) and who could forget Adam Morrison? (I know what he's up to these days...riding the pine in LA)
Pittsnogle will be forever remembered as the reason why March Madness is the greatest thing alive.
One of the cool things about the Vipers and the D-League in general, it is very interactive. They have like ten blogs and a facebook group. They are a weekly podcast away from hitting all the realms of new media. One of the blogs is called "The Real Upside." I only point this blog out because it's slogan is and I quote, "Blogging the NBA D-League: Where Potential Is Way Cooler Than Reality."
What the hell kind of motto is that for a young and up and comer? So what they are basically telling these guys are, "Hey listen it's much more fun to imagine yourself as the best player on an NBA rather than facing the reality of the situation and working hard towards achieving your dreams." This blows my mind. What kind of advice is that BS? I wish my college journalism professor told me it's more fun to imagine yourself as a syndicated columnist than facing the realism of the situation and working hard. Perhaps I'd be in euforia making $12-24k a year, harping on my "potential." What kind of Candy Land drugs was the author of this blog on when he made that crappy motto up?
Okay, sorry, rant over. And yes for the record, I make more cash than a D-League player. Awesome. Anyway, let's wrap this up with something a little less irksome. The Dance Team. Or as they are called, "The Snake Charmers." Now that's a sexual innuedo if I've ever heard one! I searched through their profiles to find someone I could make fun of - and I did. It took a little while though, the Trouser Snake Charmers were pretty impressive. Until I got to Priscilla who wrote the following under Who Is Your Role Model and Why?
"My role model would have to be Angelina Jolie." Alright stop right there, I don't need to hear any more. Angelina Jolie is your role model? We have doctors and firefighters, Mother Theresa and Ghandi, the President or wait here's an idea...how about family? I don't know about you, but my role models are my parents. And literally every other snake charmer picked a member of their family. Except for Priscilla, who picked Angelina Jolie. I should have stopped reading there but of course I kept going,
"Not only is she a beautiful actress but she is the perfect definition of beauty inside and out. Yes, she has made some bad decisions in her past but she has found her own and bounced back from all of it. When not on a movie set Jolie is out promoting humanitarian causes throughout the world, and is noted for her work with refugees."
I can think of turds that are better role models than Angelina Jolie
What the fuck? Are you her publicist? First of all, beauty should have nothing to do with being a role model. In fact, I'd suffice to say most role models are ugly. As we all know, ugly people have a lot more character than good looking people. But I love that last sentence, it literally reads right out of a press release. Noted work with refugees? No, noted work with refugees is actually going to a third world country and giving out water to some tribal village. It's not stealing a kid and taking them in as your own. That's called pretentious.
Oy vey. I can't go on. We went from a goofy white dude to a moronic "snake charmer." Don't you love it? TOW Is back!
Until next time...
Trying my hand at Bracketology
I've never understood bracketology. Either you are in - or you are not. There's no sense in debating it to no end because some jabroni puts up his mock bracket. Do you really think the tournament committee pays attention to what some guy named Joe Lunardi thinks? It's the same thing with the draft. I'm pretty sure out of the 32 GMs in the NFL, not a single one would go to Mel Kiper for advice. I'm not trying to put down Lunardi, cause if you have to listen to a bracketologist then it's him - but let's be honest, the whole thing is media hogwash. It was created by ESPN to generate more debate, traffic and viewers to their products. For the record this is why they are the Worldwide Leader in Sports - they employ mad scientist like marketing geniuses to come up with ways to get morons like us to debate sports like its abortion. Either that or they just bully everyone into conforming into their system.
Plus, here's the other problem with bracketology: its created under the always frustrating notion of "if the season ended today." So unless it was made literally an hour before 7 pm Selection Sunday (or whatever time they announce it) - it's pointless. If the season ended today - puh-lease. Are there five stupider words in sports? I hate when people say that. If the season ended today. So I guess if an asteroid wipes out the entire country - then, and only then, can we use this as a legitimate bracket prediction. Because guess what? The season isn't ending today. Many, many things can happen between now AND and the end of the season. And this is college hoops. They usually do.
So naturally, even though I think it's absurd, I'm going to try my hand at bracketology. Why not? Everyone else does it - last year I remember counting some-odd 30 mock brackets. Thirty? If those thirty people put that much effort into figuring out why the banks in our country f'ed up so bad, we might not be in that deep of a recession. I won't lie - this is going to be a haphazard effort. I'm going to try to see if I can half-ass this and do just as good as the ones who put hours of effort into this shit. One quick note before I begin - 31 of the bids are automatic, as in the conference tourney champion gets to go. Of course, since half of these conferences are low to mid majors most people have never heard of, it's literally impossible to predict who the winner of said conference tourney will be. So if I picked UT-Martin and the team is Austin Peay - don't kill me.
OH HELL YEAH...STEVE AUSTIN IS GOING DANCING YA SILLY BASTARDS. Oh wait. Wrong Steve Austin. And it's just my silly prediction. Damn.
Here goes nothing
Well...duh
ACC: UNC, Duke, Wake, Clemson, Florida State
A-10: Xavier
Big 12: Oklahoma, Kansas, Mizzou
Big East: UConn, Pitt, Louisville, Marquette (as long as they literally win one more game - if they lose out and don't have Dominic James, I could say the committee screwing them over - but yeah that's not happening), Nova, Cuse
Big Ten: Michigan State, Purdue, Illinois
C-USA: Memphis
Horizon: Butler
Mountain West: Utah, BYU
Pac 10: UCLA, Washington, Arizona State, California
SEC: LSU, South Carolina, Tennessee
West Coast Conference: Gonzaga
30 by my count - 30 most assuredly will be in, no matter what happens in the conference tourneys.
Here's my batch of...
Other conference winners
America East: Binghamton
Atlantic Sun: Belmont
Big Sky: Weber State
Big South: Radford
Big West: Cal-State Northridge
Big Pimpin: Hova...(ha gotcha)
CAA: Northeastern (for my main man Tom Hannon even though I know it's going to George Mason)
Ivy: Brown...if only dad if only. Just kidding it's Cornell.
MAAC: Mari - er, Siena (more on this later in the week)
MAC: Buffalo
MEAC: Morgan State
Missouri Valley: Creighton
NEC: Robert Morris
Ohio Valley: Austin Peay
Patriot League: American
Southern: Davidson
Southland: Stephen F. Austin - OH. HELL. YAH.
SWAC: Alabama State
Holy shit there are a lot of these
Summit: Oral Roberts (For my friend Katie who thinks this is the funniest name for a school ever)
Sun Belt: Alabama State
WAC: The fact there are this many conferences is wack...oh hardy har har GP. It's Utah State
Wow...okay that adds 20 to the mix. So we are at 50. Simple math lives us with 15 left. These would be the so called "bubble teams." Here's who's getting in - from my mouth to your gambling addicted brain.
Bubble boys
ACC: Boston College, Miami, V-Tech
Atlantic 10: Rhode Island
Big 12: Oklahoma State, Texas, Texas A&M
Big East: West Virginia, Providence
Big Ten: Wisconsin, Penn State, Ohio State, Minnesota
Pac 10: Arizona
SEC: Florida
That would be 65.
Just missed: Michigan, UNLV, Maryland, San Diego St., UAB
------------------------------
There you have it...for the record, I pretty much used realtimerpi.com and the conference standings to determine everything. This was in fact no science. However, if I'm right I'm going to send this shit to Lunardi and probably make him rethink his life's work.
YUP. I'D DO THAT.
Sweet red turtle neck Lunardi. Did you mug Andy Warhol on the way to the ESPN studios?
Plus, here's the other problem with bracketology: its created under the always frustrating notion of "if the season ended today." So unless it was made literally an hour before 7 pm Selection Sunday (or whatever time they announce it) - it's pointless. If the season ended today - puh-lease. Are there five stupider words in sports? I hate when people say that. If the season ended today. So I guess if an asteroid wipes out the entire country - then, and only then, can we use this as a legitimate bracket prediction. Because guess what? The season isn't ending today. Many, many things can happen between now AND and the end of the season. And this is college hoops. They usually do.
So naturally, even though I think it's absurd, I'm going to try my hand at bracketology. Why not? Everyone else does it - last year I remember counting some-odd 30 mock brackets. Thirty? If those thirty people put that much effort into figuring out why the banks in our country f'ed up so bad, we might not be in that deep of a recession. I won't lie - this is going to be a haphazard effort. I'm going to try to see if I can half-ass this and do just as good as the ones who put hours of effort into this shit. One quick note before I begin - 31 of the bids are automatic, as in the conference tourney champion gets to go. Of course, since half of these conferences are low to mid majors most people have never heard of, it's literally impossible to predict who the winner of said conference tourney will be. So if I picked UT-Martin and the team is Austin Peay - don't kill me.
OH HELL YEAH...STEVE AUSTIN IS GOING DANCING YA SILLY BASTARDS. Oh wait. Wrong Steve Austin. And it's just my silly prediction. Damn.
Here goes nothing
Well...duh
ACC: UNC, Duke, Wake, Clemson, Florida State
A-10: Xavier
Big 12: Oklahoma, Kansas, Mizzou
Big East: UConn, Pitt, Louisville, Marquette (as long as they literally win one more game - if they lose out and don't have Dominic James, I could say the committee screwing them over - but yeah that's not happening), Nova, Cuse
Big Ten: Michigan State, Purdue, Illinois
C-USA: Memphis
Horizon: Butler
Mountain West: Utah, BYU
Pac 10: UCLA, Washington, Arizona State, California
SEC: LSU, South Carolina, Tennessee
West Coast Conference: Gonzaga
30 by my count - 30 most assuredly will be in, no matter what happens in the conference tourneys.
Here's my batch of...
Other conference winners
America East: Binghamton
Atlantic Sun: Belmont
Big Sky: Weber State
Big South: Radford
Big West: Cal-State Northridge
Big Pimpin: Hova...(ha gotcha)
CAA: Northeastern (for my main man Tom Hannon even though I know it's going to George Mason)
Ivy: Brown...if only dad if only. Just kidding it's Cornell.
MAAC: Mari - er, Siena (more on this later in the week)
MAC: Buffalo
MEAC: Morgan State
Missouri Valley: Creighton
NEC: Robert Morris
Ohio Valley: Austin Peay
Patriot League: American
Southern: Davidson
Southland: Stephen F. Austin - OH. HELL. YAH.
SWAC: Alabama State
Holy shit there are a lot of these
Summit: Oral Roberts (For my friend Katie who thinks this is the funniest name for a school ever)
Sun Belt: Alabama State
WAC: The fact there are this many conferences is wack...oh hardy har har GP. It's Utah State
Wow...okay that adds 20 to the mix. So we are at 50. Simple math lives us with 15 left. These would be the so called "bubble teams." Here's who's getting in - from my mouth to your gambling addicted brain.
Bubble boys
ACC: Boston College, Miami, V-Tech
Atlantic 10: Rhode Island
Big 12: Oklahoma State, Texas, Texas A&M
Big East: West Virginia, Providence
Big Ten: Wisconsin, Penn State, Ohio State, Minnesota
Pac 10: Arizona
SEC: Florida
That would be 65.
Just missed: Michigan, UNLV, Maryland, San Diego St., UAB
------------------------------
There you have it...for the record, I pretty much used realtimerpi.com and the conference standings to determine everything. This was in fact no science. However, if I'm right I'm going to send this shit to Lunardi and probably make him rethink his life's work.
YUP. I'D DO THAT.
Sweet red turtle neck Lunardi. Did you mug Andy Warhol on the way to the ESPN studios?
Making a case for the trade
"Only a second?" I won't lie, those were in fact the first words out of my mouth, once I found out the compensation for the Pats in the Cassel/Vrabel trade. We traded a potential franchise QB with upside and a serviceable LB with great leadership skills for a mere second round pick. For one thing, if you are trading two for one, the one better be damn worth it. Sadly, the one is an unknown prospect who may or may not flourish into an NFL star. So yes, I was a little upset. I mean, surely we could have done better. At least a first round pick. Or maybe a second and a fourth. Just a second? Forget throwing a bone. It seemed with this move, Belichick was throwing his former number two, Scott Pioli, a fucking cow.
Then in typical Gabe/undying allegiance to all things Patriots fashion, I started talking myself into the trade. It happened slowly but surely. Okay, not really, I just needed to read a few positive comments online in message boards/articles/etc, and I think I was set. Most importantly I realized, this frees up the all important cap space the Pats need. If the Pats can use this money to sign Vince Wilfork to a long term extension and add a top notch CB. There has to be more to this trade. Hopefully it's the first in a series of long moves which will make the Pats a better team. Then I'm all for it. If not, well then all bets are off.
Secondly, I'm starting to come to grips with the fact maybe us Pats fans overvalued Cassel. For the cap hit and the potential one-year wonder factor, I think teams may have been hesitant to give up too much for him. After all, in recent years we've seen teams give up more for less and get completely burned. Remember the AJ Feeley trade? The Matt Schaub signing? One NFC scout was even quoted as saying he sees, "Scott Mitchell" when he sees Matt Cassel. Personally I think that's absurd. Matt Cassel did indeed benefit from having Randy Moss and Wes Welker to throw to. However, he showed a lot of innate ability towards the end of the season. In a league that has seen Rex Grossman go to a Superbowl, I think you have to give Cassel a chance. Yet, I guess other teams didn't see it that way. As for Vrabel? He has always been an integral part of the team and the Pats will definitely miss his presence in the locker room. But anyone who watched the Pats even remotely last year - agrees they have to get younger on defense. It's a fact.
Finally, It's Belichick. While he has made some poor F/A choices and draft picks over the years, when it comes to big moves like this has he ever steered us wrong? With his first big draft pick in 2001 he selected Richard Seymour. The haters (including myself) wanted David Terrell. Point Belichick. People sneered when he traded away Drew Bledsoe to a division rival. Then after watching a washed up Drew make the same aggravativing mistakes he had made in New England, and watching Tom Brady blossom into a star, we realized who was right. Point Belichick. He released Lawyer Milloy right before the start of the 2003 season. The Pats, with Rodney Harrison, won the Superbowl that year and barely missed Milloy's presence. Point Belichick. He trades for Randy Moss and Corey Dillon. Potential problem children? No sir. Point Belichick. The list goes on and on.
My point being, after nine years and one losing season, three Superbowl wins, four appearances, five AFC championship game appearances and six AFC east championships - I'm going to give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Of course, now you have the people saying we'll find out who the real brains behind the operation was - Pioli or Belichick. I've heard this one before. Let's see who was the brains - Belichick or Weis, Belichick or Crennel, Belichick or Mangini. Who was more responsible for the the Pats success (which was a truly idiotic question if there ever was one - since I'd say they are both equally responsible for the team's success) Belichick or Brady. Keep doubting the man and he'll keep making you look stupid.
In fact, now that I'm thinking about it - I think we may have just traded an unproven QB and an aging LB for a future hall of famer. Good move Patriots. Oh and if anything, this little move did prove one thing.
He's coming baaaaaaaaaaaaack. Hallelejuah.
Then in typical Gabe/undying allegiance to all things Patriots fashion, I started talking myself into the trade. It happened slowly but surely. Okay, not really, I just needed to read a few positive comments online in message boards/articles/etc, and I think I was set. Most importantly I realized, this frees up the all important cap space the Pats need. If the Pats can use this money to sign Vince Wilfork to a long term extension and add a top notch CB. There has to be more to this trade. Hopefully it's the first in a series of long moves which will make the Pats a better team. Then I'm all for it. If not, well then all bets are off.
Secondly, I'm starting to come to grips with the fact maybe us Pats fans overvalued Cassel. For the cap hit and the potential one-year wonder factor, I think teams may have been hesitant to give up too much for him. After all, in recent years we've seen teams give up more for less and get completely burned. Remember the AJ Feeley trade? The Matt Schaub signing? One NFC scout was even quoted as saying he sees, "Scott Mitchell" when he sees Matt Cassel. Personally I think that's absurd. Matt Cassel did indeed benefit from having Randy Moss and Wes Welker to throw to. However, he showed a lot of innate ability towards the end of the season. In a league that has seen Rex Grossman go to a Superbowl, I think you have to give Cassel a chance. Yet, I guess other teams didn't see it that way. As for Vrabel? He has always been an integral part of the team and the Pats will definitely miss his presence in the locker room. But anyone who watched the Pats even remotely last year - agrees they have to get younger on defense. It's a fact.
Finally, It's Belichick. While he has made some poor F/A choices and draft picks over the years, when it comes to big moves like this has he ever steered us wrong? With his first big draft pick in 2001 he selected Richard Seymour. The haters (including myself) wanted David Terrell. Point Belichick. People sneered when he traded away Drew Bledsoe to a division rival. Then after watching a washed up Drew make the same aggravativing mistakes he had made in New England, and watching Tom Brady blossom into a star, we realized who was right. Point Belichick. He released Lawyer Milloy right before the start of the 2003 season. The Pats, with Rodney Harrison, won the Superbowl that year and barely missed Milloy's presence. Point Belichick. He trades for Randy Moss and Corey Dillon. Potential problem children? No sir. Point Belichick. The list goes on and on.
My point being, after nine years and one losing season, three Superbowl wins, four appearances, five AFC championship game appearances and six AFC east championships - I'm going to give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Of course, now you have the people saying we'll find out who the real brains behind the operation was - Pioli or Belichick. I've heard this one before. Let's see who was the brains - Belichick or Weis, Belichick or Crennel, Belichick or Mangini. Who was more responsible for the the Pats success (which was a truly idiotic question if there ever was one - since I'd say they are both equally responsible for the team's success) Belichick or Brady. Keep doubting the man and he'll keep making you look stupid.
In fact, now that I'm thinking about it - I think we may have just traded an unproven QB and an aging LB for a future hall of famer. Good move Patriots. Oh and if anything, this little move did prove one thing.
He's coming baaaaaaaaaaaaack. Hallelejuah.